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...I know you've mentioned that to me before, and that's why I'm asking. It tends to be a little strange when you remember being emotionally detached from everything and then stumble across something that managed to make them feel something, even if it wasn't much.

I'm here if you want to discuss it, or anything else you remember. You know that.

Yes, I know. I really do appreciate it. It's been awhile since I remembered anything that's actually bothered me.

But I really am okay. It was a bit jarring to remember something like that, but I'm fine now. I'll let you know if I remember anything else about it.

[That does get him to relax now that it's out there. That actually wasn't all that bad? He still feels a little weird about it, but he didn't lie to Wesker, he really is fine.]

I appreciate that you told me.

[...]

You have my apologies, incidentally. For making you remember something like that.

Ah, it's not your fault. Please don't blame yourself for it.

[He'll reach out for Wesker's hand at that.]

I was going to remember it at some point, ja? Better to remember it now, while I'm in a place where I can handle it.

...Not that I expect things to get worse, but... well, you know what I'm getting at.

[He'll accept Jaeger's hand easily; he shakes his head, though.]

It's all right, I'm not blaming myself - I know it couldn't have been helped. It's still unfortunate.

[...He's having a decent self-esteem and self-awareness day today, it seems.]

[That's good, it gets Jaeger to smile.]

It is, yes, but I'm okay. The last thing I want is for you to worry about that.

[He squeezes Wesker's hand.]

And if I'm not okay, I promise I'll come to you.

Good. I do want to be here for you.

[...]

I know I haven't always been able to promise that in the past; I've had a fair amount of my own problems to work through. But I believe I'm more capable of helping you now, should you need it.

Edited 2018-07-25 06:30 (UTC)

[He brightens a bit at that.]

You've always been very good at helping me, you know. But I'm really happy to hear that! You do seem to be doing better lately; I'm really pleased to see it.

I've been feeling better lately; you've done a lot for me this month in particular.

Ah, really? I'm so glad! It means a lot to me that I can help you.

[ c: ]

...I know it upset me at the time, but I needed that discussion we had regarding my past life. It helped to put some things into perspective, I think.

I know it was hard on you, and I do apologize for upsetting you like that. I'm really glad it helped, though.

You don't have to apologize; it was necessary, I think.

It's good that it was something that helped you, and I really did feel it was important to tell you how I feel about all of that. Still, you know I don't like upsetting you...

I know you don't. But I do think it helped.

[...]

Might I ask you something?

Of course. You can always ask me anything. What is it?

I know you don't particularly like this topic, coming from me. But I've been curious about it since that discussion - do you think people can be inherently evil, or do you believe it all to be a matter of circumstance?

[Mm, you're right, he doesn't like the topic, but give him a moment to consider it.]

...No, I don't believe people can be inherently evil. There are certainly people out there who do terrible things, even without any sort of reason, but even then I can't say they're inherently evil.

Perhaps it's just because I do want to believe that everyone is capable of being at least a decent person, but I don't like the idea that anyone is always going to be evil.

It's admittedly a bit of a tricky topic, and I'll admit my views come from wanting to believe that there's at least a chance for good in everyone.

I see.

[He doesn't, but he's trying.]

It's always been something I've believed in, really - a predisposition toward one or the other, at least, if not an inherent trait. I've never found it easy to have faith in people like what you're describing.

It is putting a lot of trust in people, which isn't really something I do otherwise...

But I do want to believe that everyone could be good at some point, even if their circumstances are so terrible that they no longer believe that.

[It doesn't really cover people who are awful just because, but he's trying.]

Why do you believe people are predisposed to be one or the other? Do you think a person who is "evil" can ever be good?

A person who is evil would have no real capacity for good, I think.

[So no, not really.]

It's just how I've always known things to be; I've never particularly questioned it. It's always seemed to be the order of things.

For what it's worth, I do believe there to be fewer truly evil people than there are truly good.

Well, at least there's that...

[...He knows he's not going to like the answer to this, but he has to ask.]

Where do you think you fall?

I...

[He pauses for a moment; he knows Jaeger won't like any of what he wants to say, and it takes him a while to find words.]

Some people don't have the capacity to be either. They don't possess the general inclination to be evil, but they also lack any ability to truly be good - they're defective in some way, and it shows in how they relate to the world. So they may not be evil, but they can never be considered truly good, either.

That's where I fall.

[For a long moment, Jaeger doesn't know what to say to that. He tenses at the word "defective" and doesn't relax even once Wesker's done explaining. His grip on Wesker's hand has gone very tight as well.]

...You really believe that? You really believe you're "defective"? Why?

...Yes, of course.

[And this is probably a good example of why, really - he can tell, cognitively, that Jaeger is getting upset, but this is just a fact to him and he's going to state it as such.]

You know I don't relate to people well - that my capacity for empathy is very low. I don't care if I lose people close to me; at best it's a temporary setback, an inconvenience. I have a few exceptions, but generally I only keep people close if they're useful to me in some way.

I don't feel things in ways that a good person would, assuming I feel them at all. If I do good things, it's because I'm forcing myself to act as I think a good person should; I have no natural capacity to be a good person simply because it's who I am.

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