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I...

[A reasonably short while ago, he would have said he doesn't deserve anything like that, wouldn't he?]

...I think so too, yes.

[He knows, and he's so happy Wesker doesn't say it now.]

I'm really pleased to hear that... Thank you for telling me. I... I'm really happy.

[He shifts a little at that, pulling Jaeger closer against him and just holding him a bit.]

I didn't realize that it would be so important to you.

[Oh, that's nice...]

Of course it is. I do worry about you, you know! It's nice to know I don't have to worry as much, about that at least!

[It's gentle teasing, but it's true...]

The nightmares have been subsiding a good amount. Once in a while I still have them, but it's not nearly as often anymore.

[It's been good, honestly.]

A good amount of the positive ones take place back in Raccoon City, before the outbreak - back when I was working with S.T.A.R.S. I don't think they're actual memories; they feel different. But it's good to have them regardless.

I'm really glad they aren't as common now.

Those do sound like interesting dreams, though! Are you going on missions or is it downtime that you're dreaming about?

A bit of both, though it's usually the latter. Spending time like normal people for once.

Ah, that does sound nice... Do you like those dreams?

[He can see where it might just be really weird, honestly.]

[He sort of has to think about it for a moment; they certainly aren't bad, it's just sort of weird to quantify whether he likes them or not - he hadn't really thought about it.]

...I think so. It's a little strange to think about; I don't know if I ever really spent time with people like that or if I kept to myself back then. I suppose it's possible that it's just what I would have wanted for myself... Either way, though, I think I like them well enough.

I think that's normal, to have wanted something different for your past life. I'm glad you like them, though! They do sound like lovely dreams.

Yes. And I did like Chris and Jill to at least some extent. I couldn't relate to them at all, of course, but they were decent people and they were never terrible to me. They respected me; they treated me well.

I don't think I really knew what to think of that back then, other than expecting it to some extent simply due to my station. But I imagine it was a good thing, given that they remained important to me until the end.

[Not...important in a good way, necessarily, but...]

[Y-yeah...]

Yes, I think so too. I wonder if you liked them too, it just wasn't something you were fully aware of and didn't really know how to handle. I do wish things could have been different and maybe you could have gotten along with them better.

[But he wishes a lot about Wesker's past life was different, and it's not like there's any changing it.]

[Mm.]

The Umbrella Corporation ensured that I didn't know how to handle a lot of normal things like that. I knew that what was happening there was abnormal - I wrote journal entries regarding how everyone in the compound was insane, and it was only going to keep escalating the longer we were kept there - but I also didn't know anything else, and so I wasn't sure how to handle or relate to other people.

I do think I liked them, however, in my own way.

It sounds difficult. I'm glad you were able to leave Umbrella eventually, even if it wasn't the way you'd hoped for.

[...]

I'm sorry things were so difficult in your past life. I know you're upset by a lot of what happened there - both what happened to you and what you did - but I really do believe that if things had been different, you wouldn't have turned out like that.

I am glad you had people you liked, though. It's a shame things couldn't have gone better with Chris and Jill.

[He lets his grip tighten against Jaeger a little bit at that - nothing desperate, it's gentle, just enough to be felt.]

It's a lot to come to terms with. It's...merciful, really, that I don't remember much of what was done to me back then; what Spencer said about it, and about me, affected my past life far more than it affects me now. It was painful then, in ways that I wasn't used to and didn't know how to handle.

What I did is always going to be difficult for me to deal with, I think. But it's getting easier.

[He'll shift a bit to return that, before nuzzling Wesker a bit.]

I know. I don't think that's something that most people could ignore or be at peace with. It's difficult, but I'm very glad that it's getting easier for you. Last year was... was really rough. But you do seem to be doing better now, and I'm really happy to see it.

No matter what you have left to remember, we'll make it through. I'll always be right here beside you.

...I know last year was hard on you.

[He'll return that nuzzling, all right, even if it's a bit awkward.]

I know that I haven't always been able to be there for you, or to be good to you in the way that I should have. But I'm doing what I can now, and I intend to keep it that way.

Things have been difficult, yes. I really can't deny that! But that's not because you weren't there for me enough or anything like that. You've always been good to me, and you've helped me through so much. Please don't think that you haven't done enough for me, because you've done so much.

...It's been good of you to stay with me, despite everything that happened.

[The whole...undead thing is kind of a lot, um.]

Of course I'm going to stay with you, I love you so much, after all! Nothing in the world could ever change my mind about that.

I know.

[And he does, from the sound of it.]

It's just a lot to handle, that's all. I...appreciate that you still wanted to touch me and be affectionate despite all of that.

[Even if he wasn't really able to handle it for a while himself.]

I know it was incredibly difficult for you, but I wanted you to know that it wouldn't change things for me. It's certainly not exactly the same, but you did that for me as well, and I wanted to do everything I could to try to make things a bit easier for you.

[More nuzzling, okay.]

I love you just as much now as I did before, if not even more!

It's good to know that.

[...Ah, but that's...]

I've never questioned whether you love me, because I know that you do. But I'll admit the question of whether you preferred things the way they were before or not has crossed my mind, from time to time.

I understand. I think it's normal to question that. It's probably something I should have made clear earlier, sorry about that...

[It just. didn't really occur to him....]

But no, I don't prefer things the way they were. I'm very happy with you as you are right now, and as I said, I'll always love you, no matter what happens.

[That definitely includes Uroboros.]

You don't ever need to question that. Being with you is the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I love you so much, Albert. You're still just as incredibly attractive as you were the day you first walked in my shop~!

[...That's nice, all right, even if he's still got his doubts about Uroboros. Not that Jaeger wouldn't want to try to help or wouldn't still love him, because he believes that he would, but...

They can deal with Uroboros if it happens, he supposes.]

I really must have made some kind of impression... I'm honestly surprised you were willing to keep trying for so long back then.

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